I don't know

I don't know.
I know where I stand...until something changes again.
I feel the world crumbling around me.  
My life falls apart and every day, my little island grows smaller and smaller.  
Time and time again, I feel like jumping off.  The wait is what's killing me.  
The hope that it will eventually stop, and I'll be fine...it sickens me because I keep feeling that hope's fleeting and it will hurt all the more if I wait for my hopes to prove false.

I don't know.
I know who I want to be.  It took me 22 years, but I do now know.
Everyone on TV when you're small says to be yourself.
Every idealistic story, the morals of them say that everything works out when you're yourself.
But their words fall on mostly deaf ears.  I remember, but the world forgets.
I want to be myself, but the world around me doesn't.
And it feels like they're trying to keep me from myself.

I don't know.
My little patch of land is so small now.
Escape seems impossible, and I can feel it all crashing down, trying to crush me.
I feel like jumping off, giving up the sinking ship, just to get it over with.
But now I can't.
In spite of all that's going wrong, something defiant has gone right.  
Something that keeps me here, someone who keeps me from jumping.
Almost like a small rope from somewhere far above me is hanging down.  
I want to hang on, but as I grasp it, nothing happens.  
I'm not pulled to safety,
The world continues to crumble, and I continue to fear for the worst.  
I know the land will finally fall away, and I'll be left hanging on to my lifeline.  
Feeling my arms getting tired.

I want to hang on...but I don't know if I can